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Iowahawk: Comply with me … sing along

He is one of the finest creative writers on the net today. He’s the man who brought us the Obama teleprompter revolt and the now famous rework of Obama’s “car in the ditch” story. Now we have a little “Frank Sinatra” … Comply with me.

I still take these searches very seriously. I believe the TSA is going too far in the name of safety. I believe that if the TSA, booking agents, the FBI and CIA, did their jobs, we would not need to hands up skirts or pants. But sometimes even the most serious subject deserves a laugh. From Iowa Hawk … to the tune “Come Fly with Me” by Sammy Cahn. If you want to sing along, we have included an instrumental by Michael Buble.

Hit it, Frank.

Comply with me, before you fly away
Remove those shoes and take a cruise
Through my peekaboo X-ray
Comply with me, I’m your friendly TSA

Comply with me, you domestic coach class bums
If you opt out I’ll just give a shout
To my icy-handed chums
Comply with me, bend over here it comes

Once I get all up there where your hair is ticklish
I’ll just fish
Got my wish
Once I get all up there you’ll be squirming like an eel
You may squeal
At the feel
When we’re together

Want to see the entire song rewrite … go here to Iowahawk.

I love the song … but being a 70’s Doors fan … this isn’t bad either, heh?

Hey, how about adding your own official songs of the TSA in the comment section below.

7 replies
  1. winnie888
    winnie888 says:

    Sing to The Proclaimers, "I'm Gonna Be (500 miles)"

    When I wake up yeah I know I'm gonna be

    I'm gonna be the man who's getting groped by you…

    When I go out, yeah I know I'm gonna be

    I'm gonna be the man who's dragged off without shoes.

    If I get punk, yes I know I'm gonna be

    I'm gonna be the man who gets arrested, too.

    And if I argue, yeah I know I'm gonna be

    I'm gonna be the man whose junk gets groped by you!

    But I would walk 500 miles

    And I would walk 500 more

    Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles

    To save my own back door.

    When I'm flying, yes I know I'm gonna be

    I'm gonna be the one who's praying hard that you

    Bypass me in your random screening ways

    And my junk is never squeezed again by you

    When I come home, yeah I know I'm gonna be

    I'm gonna be the man who comes back black & blue

    And if I grow old, well I know I'm gonna be

    The one who never finds a screener worse than you

    But I would walk 500 miles

    And I would walk 500 more

    Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles

    To save my own back door.

    OPTED OUTTA! OPTED OUTTA! OPTED OUTTA! OPTED OUTTA! OPTED OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OUTTA…

    When I'm lonely, yes I know I'm gonna be

    I'm gonna be the man who's lonely 'cause of you

    When my junk fails, yes I know I'm gonna sue

    The TSA and all it's little agents, too.

    But I would walk 500 miles

    And I would walk 500 more

    Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles

    To save my own back door.

    OPTED OUTA! OPTED OUTA! OPTED OUTA! OPTED OUTA! OPTED OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OUTA…

    OPTED OUTA! OPTED OUTA! OPTED OUTA! OPTED OUTA! OPTED OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OUTA…

    etc.

  2. RoBrDona
    RoBrDona says:

    I'm waiting for a video of guys in TSA leather trench coats saying "papers please" in a Hogan's Heroes German voice. Then giving the option of either a prodigeous cavity search or frying your future progeny. We should all spontaniously burst into song – like the Marsailles in Casablanca.   

  3. Linda Mae
    Linda Mae says:

    Can we use Glow, Little Glow worm…" as a base??? Or "We didn't start the Radiation..."  Such fun for our brains.

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